სექსუალური ძალადობა და . . . ,,რას იტყვის ხალხი?”
saqarTvelos Sinagan saqmeTa saministros mier gamoqveynebuli statistikis mixedviT, 2018 wels seqsualuri Zaladobis faqtze mxolod ocdaxuTma moqalaqem ganacxada, 2019 wlis maisis monacemebiT ki erTma.
Tqven waikiTxavT istoriebs qalebze, romlebzec seqsualurad iZalades. maT ar ganucxadebiaT danaSaulis Sesaxeb da arc damnaSaveebi dasjilan. es istoriebi amyarebs azrs, rom statistika SesaZloa cdebodes.
isini arian qalebi, romlebic isev acocxleben sakuTar TavSi mtkivneul mogonebebs im mizniT, rom amas waikiTxaven gogonebi, sxva qalebi, mamakacebi. isini Cveulebrivi, yoveldRiuri cxovrebiT cxovroben, maT surT mogawvdinon xma, TqvenSi is Zala gaaRviZon, romelic sakuTar TavSi aRmoaCines, rom ar SeuSindeT sazogadoebis azrs da ar iyoT martoni tragediebis pirispir.
bavSvobis travma, seqsualuri Seviwroeba Tu Zaladoba, depresia, stereotipebis msxverplad yofna da gaCumeba, ojaxisgan gariyuloba, arasasurveli orsuloba, arasakmarisi sqesobrivi ganaTleba da a.S., es arasruli CamonaTvali viRacis cxovrebis nawilia, amaze saubari ki – prevenciisTvis xelis Sewyoba.
am istoriebis wakiTxvis Semdeg Tqven SexedavT dedas, das, naTesavs, TanamSromels, gamvlels da gagiCndebaT eWvi, rom misi dawerilia; gaixedavT Svilisken da warmoidgenT, rom momavalSi isic SeiZleba gaxdes msxverpli, Tu ukve ar aris; gaixedavT vaJisken, Zmisken, qmrisken, yvela mamrisken, gaifiqrebT: `is xom ar aris damnaSave?~.
am istoriebis gasajaroebis mizani kacebis, sazogadoebisa da mSoblebis gansja ki ara, yoveldRiur SiSTan brZolis Semsubuqebaa, radgan SesaZloa, erTi adamiani mainc Seicvalos ukeTesobisken, daaxlovdnen mSoblebi SvilebTan, ar SeuSindnen qalebi damnaSavis gamoaSkaravebas.
istoriebi anonimuria da yvela respondentis saxeli Secvlilia, mxolod asakia realuri.
elene, 23 wlis:
– dedaCemi moitaces da ase gaTxovda. jer Cemi Zma daibada, 9 wlis Semdeg – me. rom davibade, mamaCems uTqvams, es Cemi mona iqnebao – Tavidanve aseTi damokidebuleba hqonda Cem mimarT. ded-mama maSin gaSordnen erTmaneTs, roca 4 wlis viyavi. maSin ar vicodi, rom intimuri saxis aTas sazizRrobas makeTebinebda. 5 wlis rom viyavi, gamitaca, momatyua, rom deda mokvda da saSinel pirobebSi macxovrebda, arc fuli hqonda, arc saxli. boTlebs vagrovebdiT da vabarebdiT. fexebi gadatyavebuli mqonda, ra mecva, arc vici, daglejili Cvari. xan visTan vcxovrobdiT 2 dRiT, xan visTan, am yvelafers ki isic emateboda, rom Cemze Zaladobda. magram veravis vuyvebodi. gacnobierebuli arc mqonda, ras akeTebda. dedaCemi 6 Tve gveZebda policiis daxmarebiT. gaigebda, visTan viyaviT, meore dRes iq movidoda da aRar viyaviT. bolos, rogorc iqna, rom mipoves, bebiaCemma mkiTxa, gaupatiurebdao? mxolod maSin mivxvdi, ras niSnavda es. pataraobidanve mesmoda, rom aseT Temebze ar laparakobdnen, malavdnen. dedaCemisgan xSirad gamigia, xalxi ras ityviso da… da vuTxari, ara-meTqi. skolaSi rom Sevedi, mama makiTxavda da gamovyavdi. isev Zaladobda Cemze da isev veravis verafers veubnebodi. megona, me dambraldeboda yvelaferi. ase grZeldeboda 9 wlamde. mere vuTxari, Tu Tavs ar damanebebda, yvelafers dedas movuyvebodi. Tumca momyoli ar viyavi. megona, rom mere Tu xalxi alaparakdeboda, mTeli cxovreba davitanjebodi. maSin mamaCemi droebiT SemeSva, magram 11 wlis rom Sevsruldi, isev damireka da miTxra, 12-is rom gavxdebodi, pirvelad masTan unda davwoliliyavi. ukve tiriliT movuyevi yvelaferi dedas, Tumca man ubralod galanZRa mama da isic – CemTan. im donemde mivedi, rom 12 wlamde vgegmavdi, Tu xels damakarebda, rogor momekla. Tveebi gadioda, me kidev vitanjebodi amaze fiqriT. magram sanam 12 wlis gavxdebodi, 1 TviT adre loTobisgan janmrTelobis problema Seeqmna da gardaicvala. am istoriam Semiqmna uamravi problema cxovrebaSi. aravis vendobodi, xSirad vfiqrobdi, me rom Tavidanve yvelaferi momeyola, es wlobiT aRar gagrZeldeboda. 23 wlis var da dRemde ver vitan, roca viRac mexeba. did travmad CamrCa. saerTod rom ar mcodnoda fraza – `xalxi ras ityvis~, wlobiT ar davitanjebodi, mamaCemic pasuxs agebda da mec ar gavizrdebodi aseT stresSi.
– isev ojaxTan erTad cxovrob?
– eg calke istoriaa. mokled rom vTqva, isev ojaxTan erTad. rogor vcxovrob da. . . sul ori megobari myavs. komunikabeluri var, magram aravis vendobi am oris garda. aqamde uaresad viyavi, nel-nela vcdilob, gamovide situaciidan. wlebis ganmavlobaSi depresia mtanjavda, magram arasdros vimCnevdi. mosayolad advilia, magram roca aseT rames gadaitan pataraobidanve. . . Znelia daiviwyo da warsulma Tavi ar Segaxsenos. fsiqologTan mindoda mevlo, magram. . . 1 seansi, sul cota, 50 lari Rirso. finansuri problemebis gamo ver mivdivar.
barbare, 21 wlis:
– davibade da gavizarde sofelSi. Semdeg Tsu-Si Cavabare da sacxovreblad dedaqalaqSi gadavedi. universitetSi gavicani erTi biWi, romelic asakiT Cemze didi iyo, daaxloebiT, 7-8 wliT. nel-nela davaxlovdiT, Tumca arc ise, rom megobrad an Seyvarebulad aRgveqva erTmaneTi. SedarebiT met dros CemTan atarebda, vidre sxvebTan. universitetTan Zalian axlos vmuSaob da ramdenjerme saxlSi manqaniT wayvana SemomTavaza, Tumca sul merideboda Sewuxeba. sxvadasxva gza gvqonda da mudam uariT vistumrebdi. erTxel mTeli Ramis ganmavlobaSi momiwia muSaoba da diliT leqcia gavacdine. gaukvirda, leqciaze rom ar viyavi da momikiTxa. movuyevi, ase da ase-meTqi. gamomiara manqaniT, saxlSi wagiyvano. wavediT. saxlSi SevipatiJe, mTeli Ramis uZinars yavis daleva mindoda da damewvie-meTqi, SevTavaze. yava ki gavakeTe, magram sawolze rogor aRmovCndi, ar maxsovs. moulodnelad tkivili vigrZeni. Tvalebi rom gavaxile, ukve azri aRarafers hqonda. . . es iyo gavelurebuli adamiani, aranairi dandoba. . . qaliSviloba ase davkarge. cota xanSi mivxvdi, rom orsulad viyavi. aborti gavikeTe. amis Sesaxeb ar icoda aravin, arc megobarma, arc mSoblebma. . . didxans vfiqrobdi, rom am yvelaferSi damnaSave me viyavi da sircxvilic CemiT unda momewminda. saSinel depresiaSi Cavvardi. ar vdgebodi sawolidan, ar vWamdi, vtirodi dRe da Rame, ramdenjerme vcade Tavis mokvla, Tumca gambedaoba ar meyo. Semdeg gaviazre, rom ase Tavs nel-nela viklavdi, gamoviyene yvela Cemi danazogi, aviRe didi valic, rom Cemi fsiqikisTvis da janmrTelobisTvis meSvela. axlac vixdi am Tanxas… ukve 2 weli gadis am ambidan. vfiqrob, Cveni – qalebis yvelaze didi problema tragediis kidev ufro gamZafreba, pasuxismgeblobis 100%-iT sakuTar Tavze aRebaa. meSinoda arsebuli mentalitetis, Cemi ojaxis wevrebis mxridanac ki. vicodi, rom bebia, romelsac Zveleburi Sexedulebebi aqvs da fiqrobs, rom qali eSmakiseulia da is iwvevs kacs, ar daijerebda Cems udanaSaulobas. mezoblebi, romlebmac Zlivs moineles Cveni erT-erTi Tanasoflelis ukanonod gaCenili Svili, iseve daundoblad gamkicxavdnen, rogorc maSin mas da a.S. magram bolos vaRiare, rom me marTali var Cemi Tavis winaSe, zustad vici, rom is kaci me ar gamomiwvevia da rom es yvelaferi mxolod misi `idea~ da survili iyo. axla is poloneTSia. me vswavlob. momavali winaa da vici, Zalian bevri kargi ram moxdeba Cems cxovrebaSi. dedas gavuziare Cemi ambavi, gulSi Camikra da gamamxneva. gulze momeSva. minda yvelas vuTxra, rom ar varT martoni, yovelTvis unda gavuziaroT Cveni gasaWiri vinmes, visac upirobod vuyvarvarT. me maSin ar mqonda Zala, rom mebrZola, magram axla zustad vici, rom momavali naTelia da rom aucileblad movTxov mas pasuxs imisTvis, rac damakargina – mxedvelobaSi maqvs Cemi emociebi, grZnobebi da molodinebi, romelsac mudam Cems sayvarel mamakacs vukavSirebdi. axla yvelaferi kargadaa. gverdiT myavs usayvarlesi adamiani da Cveni urTierToba idealuria. isic vici, rom yvela istoria `hefi endiT~ ar mTavrdeba, magram mjera, rom pozitiur fiqrebs yvelafris Secvla SeuZlia.
seqsualuri Zaladobis Sesaxeb komentari vTxoveT fsiqolog-maswavlebels salome konceliZes.
– Cveni mentalobidan gamomdinare, Zalian rTulia seqsualur Zaladobaze saubari. pacientebic amitom ikaveben Tavs. SeiZleba am problemiT saerTodac ar movidnen CvenTan. iyo SemTxveva, rodesac pacienti moiyvanes megobrebma, romlebmac ar icodnen, ra xdeboda, magram mixvdnen, rom fsiqika Zalian hqonda dazianebuli, Zaladobda sxvebze. masTan muSaobiT gairkva, rom 20 wlis winaT mis mimarT seqsualuri Zaladobis Sedegad miRebuli travma iyo amis mizezi. samwuxarod, sakmaod aqtualuria seqsualuri Zaladoba. saerTod, nebismieri saxis Zaladobas savalalo Sedegi SeiZleba mohyves, suicidze fiqric ki. gansakuTrebiT seqsualuri Zaladoba iwvevs fsiqologiur aSlilobas, pirovnebis destruqturizacias da iSviaTad, magram fsiqologiur siSiSvlesac. fsiqologiuri siSiSvlis dros msxverpli egueba faqts da ise hyveba sakuTari ambis detalebs, TiTqos is sxvas gadaxda.
– rogor moqmedebs sazogadoebis CarTuloba pacientze?
– gaaCnia CarTulobas, aseT dros Zalian frTxilad unda SevarCioT sityvebi da qmedebebi, unda vaCvenoT, rom marto araa da vupovoT sayrdeni – Tu Tavis TavSi ara, maSin – sazogadoebaSi. aqedan gamomdinare, SeiZleba sazogadoebis CarTuloba dadebiTi iyos, magram araracionalurma Carevam SesaZloa pacientis mdgomareobis gauareseba gamoiwvios.
ana gogitiZe,
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