ემოცია, ტკივილად რომ ედება სულს
მარიამ ხითარიშვილი 27 48 93
axali weli maTTvis biznesia… am dReebSi adamianebi saswauls elian da cdiloben saswaulmoqmedni gaxdnen sxvebisTvisac – maTTvis, visac fortunam quCaSi xelgamowvdili yofna arguna. `Seni lamazi Tvalebis Wirime~, `ufali daglocavs~, `ar Caiaro, Semomxede~… msgavsi frazebi am bolos yvelgan gvesmis: quCebSi, sadarbazoebSi, gzajvaredinebze, avtosadgurebsa Tu marketebSi. am adamianebs ukve vcnobT, viciT, romeli sad zis da ramdeni xania, rac mowyalebas iTxovs. viciT is gogona, Tavis nakls rom Tamamad aCens, is qalic, ori CviliT rom mourTxams fexi, arc is biWebi gvaviwydeba, daglejili qurTukidan galurjebuli, galeuli sxeulebi rom uCanT… sad Sexvdebian axal wels, nuTu isev quCaSi?.. civa, aseT amindSi, vis ver gaagdeb gareT, kargad viciT da aRar davasruleb frazas. baTumi yovelTvis savsea mowyalebis saTxovnelad gamosuli adamianebiT. zRvispira qalaqia, zamTrobiT, sxva qveynebTan SedarebiT, Tbila, xalxic ufro mowyalea, gametebuli…
`me maTxovari var~ – amis Tqma yvela gaWirvebuls eZneleba, sulerTia, sad dgas igi – quCaSi, ezos WiSkarTan Tu kardakar dadis. bevri mitovebul da sacxovreblad uvargis SenobebSi cxovrobs.
– baTumSi qiriT vcxovrob. saaxalwlod SviliSvilebTan martvilSi mivdivar. warmoSobiT iqidan var. 9 ianvars 60 weli misruldeba. 3 Svili, 12 SviliSvili, 6 SvilTaSvili da 1 SvilTaSvilis Svilic myavs. samwuxarod, avadmyofia, 2 wlis aris da simsivne aqvs. aq marto vcxovrob, yvelas Tavisi gza aqvs da sruliad marto davrCi. SviliSvilebis imedi maqvs, albaT, sicocxlis bolomde ar gamamaTxovreben. Tumca ar mrcxvenia, miWirs da xalxi mexmareba. yvelas vulocav axal wels da bednierebas vusurveb! – miTxra mwvaneTvaleba nino bebom, romelic WavWavaZis quCaze mowyalebas iTxovs.
– axal wels xan gareT, xan saxlSi vxvdebiT. bina gvaqvs, magram Zalian bevrni varT. naZvis xes ver vyidulobT, Zviri Rirs. verc gemriel sadilebs vamzadebT. wels mxolod xili da kanfetebi gvqonda bavSvebisTvis. 3 Svili myavs, yvelaze patara 4 wlisaa. saCuqrebi ver vuyide. rac babuaCemi aWaraSi Camosaxlda, mas Semdeg aq varT. yvela gardaicvala, mxolod SviliSvilebi davrCiT. imdenad bevrni varT, rom arc tansacmeli gvyofnis da arc saWmeli. damlagebladac aravis avyavarT – ar gvendobian. rodis Seicvleba xalxis damokidebuleba Cven mimarT, ar vici. imedia, Cemi SviliSvilebi mainc moeswrebian karg cxovrebas, – daRonebuli saxiT miTxra boSa qalma leilam, romelic wvimis da susxis miuxedavad, or mcirewlovan SvilTan erTad, gorgilaZis quCaze xelgawvdili zis.
– ki, batono, axla quCaSi vdgavar samaTxovrod, magram sul ase ki ar viyavi – bazarSic vmuSaobdi da mSeneblobazec, mere xeli movitexe, gamiSeSda. eqimTan ver mivedi ufulobis gamo. baTumSi qiriT vcxovrobT. erT oTaxSi 4 suli varT. aravin muSaobs… momeci, Tu gaqvs raime, RmerTi Senc mogexmareba. saxlSi marto naZvis xe maqvs da RmerTis imedi… dedaCemma morTo – adre nayidi saTamaSoebi mqonda. wels ver viSove imdeni, rom saWmeli meyida saaxalwlod. vijeqiT naZvis xesTan da patara televizors vuyurebdiT, erT arxs iWers, – miTxra avtomanqanebis sacobTan mdgomma batonma besom.
– sul problemebi gvqonda saxlTan dakavSirebiT, quCaSic gagviTenebia. Zalian mZime pirobebSi vcxovrobT, Suqi da wyali ar gvaqvs, es aris mTavari problema. daxmareba vis ar vTxoveT, magram Sedegi ar Cans. axal wels quCaSi SevxvdiT, SevagroveT xurdebi da saaxalwlod cota produqti viyideT. naZvis xe wlebia, ar gvqonia. naZvebs totebs vatexT da fardebze vkidebT, bavSvebs uxariaT. axalgazrdobaSi moskovis cirkSi akrobati viyavi, baTumSi dasasveneblad CamovdiodiT. erTxelac simaRlidan gadmovvardi da xerxemali daviziane. ase dasrulda Cemi kariera. ise gagviWirda, yvelaferi gavyideT. Semdeg aq CamovediT da SemovrCiT. Zveli cxovrebidan mxolod cirkis mosasxami davitove, tradiciulad yovel axal wels vicvam. erTxel quCaSic movisxi, iRbliani gamodga – im Rames mowyaleba kargad movagrove, – rusulad miTxra klara bebom, romelic saaTobiT xofis bazrobaze dgas wvimaSi da daxmarebas iTxovs.
– 11 suli vcxovrobT or oTaxSi, saxli ki gadagvixures, magram Tavad Senoba iseT mdgomareobaSia, aucileblad daingreva. Cvili bavSvi myavs, ZiriTadad, xofis bazrobaze gamovdivar mowyalebisTvis, aq meti xalxia da rZis fuls yovelTvis vSoulob. bavSvi xSirad tiris. xandaxan gamyidvelebi micodeben da daxlTanac msvamen. axal wels saxlSi SevxvdiT, magram gvian quCaSi gamovediT. erTi kai biWi Segvxvda, ori patara axlda, dagvinaxa, movida da 50-lariani Camido xelSi… meore dRes bavSvs Tbili tansacmeli vuyide, marTalia, meoradebSi, magram ra mniSvneloba aqvs… bevri mekiTxeba, bavSvi ar gecodebao, ra vqna, sxva gza ar damitoves. vcilob, xalxmraval adgilebSi viaro, rom meti xurda movagrovo da male mivide saxlSi, – miTxra boSa qalma.
– martoxela qali var, vzrdi SviliSvils. qiriT vcxovrob, magram bolo ori Tvis fulis gadaxda ver movaxere. ar vici, sanamde gagvaCereben da ra moxdeba. erT sawolze ori adamiani viZinebT. saxli damewva, Semdeg meuRlec gardamecvala. 12 wlis ganmavlobaSi yvelgan mivdiodi da viTxovdi daxmarebas. socialur daxmarebas ar viReb, ar moxerxda aranairad – ra aRmoaCines aseTi CemTan, ver gavige – samsaxuri me ar maqvs da Semosavali. 18 weli eqTnad vmuSaobdi da 54 wlisa gamaTavisufles – asakiani xaro. Tu vinme mowyalebas gaiRebs, xom kargi, Tu arada, RvTis anabara var. mexuTe welia, rac quCaSi vxvdebi axal wels. ubeduri var, Cemo gogo, – miTxra eklesiasTan mjdomma, Tvalcremlianma lida bebom.
qalbaton Tamars gasaWiridan erTaderT gamosavlad taZris ezo SeurCevia: – martoxela deda var, 16 wlis biWi myavs, am axal wels masac xom unda uxarodes iseT sufrasTan dajdoma, sadac saaxalwlo tkbileuli mainc devs? me marto samaTxovrod ar vzivar aq – bevrjer wavsulvar samuSaod. axlac Tu vinme damasaqmebs – davgvi, fanjrebs gavwmend, rasac SevZleb, yvelafers gavakeTeb, oRond ki iyos raime gasakeTebeli. Cems Svils skolaSi CanTa da wignebi uyides, magram puric xom unda Wamos? amitom vwvalob da eklesiis ezoSi velodebi Semweobas. Cemi daxmareba Tu gsurT, isic dawereT – sadme samuSao Tu gamoCndeba, damasaqmon, Tundac erTjeradad. maTxovroba sizarmacis gamo ar damiwyia – cxovrebam meti saSveli ar momca da ra vqna?.. fulis Txovnas, SromiT movipovo, mirCevnia.
ar vici, riT vanugeSo es adamianebi, romlebic cxovrebis normalur pirobebze ocneboben d Tavis gadarCenis erTaderT Sanss – maTxovrobas ebRauWebian. bevrs Tavadac eTakileba es saqmianoba, magram… aravin icis, vis ras umzadebs wuTisofeli. darwmunebuli var, Tqvenc araerTxel gifiqriaT, ratom iTxovs mowyalebas, ra daemarTa, ratom mivida am ukidures zomamde. amitomac gadavwyvite gamokiTxva Cametarebina.
minda, siyvaruliT mivuloco TiToeul maTgans Soba-axali weli. janmrTelobas, sixaruls, dovlaTs da ocnebebis axdenas vusurveb am adamianebs, romlebic Cveni yofierebis yoveldRiurobaSi CarTulebi, Tundac wuTierad, axerxeben iseTi mZafri emociebis gamowvevas, tkivilad rom edeba suls.